Dear All,

I forgot to tell you about how I was hypnotized on my way to Bucharest by
the most hideous mole I’ve ever seen. There was this old bunica
(grandmother) in front of me. She was wrapped in layers and layers of
scarves, towels, hats and gloves. The bus was icy frigid when we pulled out
of the station, but within a half hour the heat kicked in. As she unpeeled
her many layers, my nostrils were filled with the eye watering scent of a
damp onion. Actually the whole bus filled with all kinds of ripe body
odors. Too bad for heat.

When she took her many hats off, I noticed she had greasy hair and a bad
dandruff problem. Then she gave me her profile. On her upper cheek, near
her eye was the strangest, fuzziest growth I had ever seen. This
mauve-colored mole had a short-haired coating of white fur. It was about a
1/2 inch in diameter and a good 1/2 in high. When I saw it, I was filled
with curiosity. I couldn’t help but stare at it. At one point, I think the
.5x.5 thing winked at me, or maybe it was just the tiny hairs waving and
saying hello.
The funny thing is, she and the mole got a glimpse of me and they too were
curious. The entire ride, she and the mole would turn to stare at me.
Watching me was more entertaining than watching TV. She pulled out some
bologna and bread and started chomping away as she studied my every move. I
didn’t want to disappoint her so I started doing strange things like reading
aloud in English and making faces. As we passed a church, she blessed
herself three times, which is the custom here. So I decided to really
confuse her and bless myself three times every time we passed a beer sign.

I think we formed an odd little friendship. We would stare at each other
and then sometimes smile and nod. Occasionally she would chuckle at some
strange face I made, and I would send mind signals to her mole in return.

As I studied her mole, I noticed the many nuances. Underneath the fur, the
mole appeared porous or crater-like. The fur began to look like a slight
dusting of snow, which made me imagine skiers perched at the top, just
waiting to head downhill. Possibly, it wasn’t a mole at all, but instead a
large growth of mold. Or was it a small peach attached to her cheek. At
one point, I saw Apollo 11 land and Neil Armstrong got out and planted the
American flag on one of its many craters. Anyway, it was a good way to pass
the time.